Why did the Indian chief wear so many feathers?
To keep his wigwam.
Friday, 31 July 2009
Friday, 24 July 2009
Friday, 17 July 2009
Foolish Friday Funny
"May I take your order?" the waiter asks.
"Yes, how do you prepare your chickens?"
"Nothing special, sir," he replies. "We just tell them straight out that they're going to die."
"Yes, how do you prepare your chickens?"
"Nothing special, sir," he replies. "We just tell them straight out that they're going to die."
Friday, 10 July 2009
Foolish Friday Funny
A golf club walks into a local bar and asks the barman for a pint of beer.
The barman refuses to serve him. "Why not," asks the golf club.
"You'll be driving later," replies the bartender.
The barman refuses to serve him. "Why not," asks the golf club.
"You'll be driving later," replies the bartender.
Friday, 03 July 2009
Foolish Friday Funny
A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet and says, "My dog's cross-eyed, is there any thing you can do?"
"Let's have a look at him." says the vet. So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes.
Finally, he says "I'm going to have to put him down."
"Just because he's cross-eyed?" asks the man.
"No, because he's really heavy," says the vet.
"Let's have a look at him." says the vet. So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes.
Finally, he says "I'm going to have to put him down."
"Just because he's cross-eyed?" asks the man.
"No, because he's really heavy," says the vet.
Friday, 26 June 2009
Friday, 19 June 2009
Foolish Friday Funny
I have a very nervous guitar playing friend.
He’s always fretting about something.
He’s always fretting about something.
Friday, 12 June 2009
Foolish Friday Funny
Sean Connery's agent calls him up and says: "Sean, I've got you an audition tomorrow morning about 10ish"
To which Sean replies "Tennish? I don't even have a racquet"
To which Sean replies "Tennish? I don't even have a racquet"
Friday, 05 June 2009
Foolish Friday Funny
I took a beer bottle to the recycling centre, but they wouldn't take it.
They said: "This is the pint of no return.”
They said: "This is the pint of no return.”
Friday, 29 May 2009
Foolish Friday Funny
What do you call a man with a number plate on his head?
Reg
What do you call a man with an odometer on his head?
Miles
Reg
What do you call a man with an odometer on his head?
Miles
Thursday, 21 May 2009
Foolish Friday Funny
A lorry full of tortoises collided with a van full of terrapins.
It was a turtle disaster.
***************************************************************
AND - because it's my BDay tomorrow....here's an old fave:
A man walks into a pub with a salmon under his arm.
He asks the barman, "Do you do fishcakes?
"The barman shakes his head.
"Shame", says the man, "It's his birthday".
It was a turtle disaster.
***************************************************************
AND - because it's my BDay tomorrow....here's an old fave:
A man walks into a pub with a salmon under his arm.
He asks the barman, "Do you do fishcakes?
"The barman shakes his head.
"Shame", says the man, "It's his birthday".
Friday, 15 May 2009
Friday, 08 May 2009
Foolish Friday Funny
Did you hear about the terrorist that tried to blow up a picnic?
His efforts were hampered.
His efforts were hampered.
Friday, 01 May 2009
Foolish Friday Funny
Ok, so it’s current....
I gotta say, I'm finding all this talk about Swine Flu pretty boaring.
*************************
I just called the National Swine Flu helpline...
All I got was crackling.
I gotta say, I'm finding all this talk about Swine Flu pretty boaring.
*************************
I just called the National Swine Flu helpline...
All I got was crackling.
Friday, 24 April 2009
Friday, 17 April 2009
Thursday, 09 April 2009
Foolish Friday Funny
I went for a job interview as a blacksmith yesterday. He said, "Have you ever shoed a horse?"
I said, "No, but I've told a donkey to piss off."
I said, "No, but I've told a donkey to piss off."
Friday, 03 April 2009
Friday, 27 March 2009
Foolish Friday Funny
I phoned the local builder today, I said to him 'Can I have a skip outside my house?'
He said, 'I'm not stopping you!'
He said, 'I'm not stopping you!'
Friday, 20 March 2009
Foolish Friday Funny
A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway. Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting!
Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled, 'PULL OVER!'
'NO!' the blonde yelled back, 'IT'S A SCARF!'
Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled, 'PULL OVER!'
'NO!' the blonde yelled back, 'IT'S A SCARF!'
Friday, 13 March 2009
Friday, 06 March 2009
Friday, 27 February 2009
Friday, 20 February 2009
Friday, 13 February 2009
Foolish Friday Funny
How many hired hands does it take to change a light bulb?
Many.....because we all know that 'many hands make light work.'
Many.....because we all know that 'many hands make light work.'
Friday, 06 February 2009
Friday, 30 January 2009
Friday, 23 January 2009
Foolish Friday Funny
A hungry lion was roaming through the jungle looking for something to eat. He came across two men. One was sitting under a tree and reading a book
the other was typing away on his typewriter.
The lion quickly pounced on the man reading the book and devoured him.
Even the king of the jungle knows that readers digest and writers cramp.
the other was typing away on his typewriter.
The lion quickly pounced on the man reading the book and devoured him.
Even the king of the jungle knows that readers digest and writers cramp.
Friday, 16 January 2009
Friday, 09 January 2009
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